What is it about us silly human beings that we tend to base our happiness and our peace off of the people around us? What people think about us, whether or not we are in a relationship, if we have a lot of friends... and so on. I don't want to let what other people think if me define who I am. I'm not trying to say that how we interact with the people around us isn't important... it's very important, but I just think we waste too much energy on letting what other people say or do shape how we view ourselves. I only say all this because it's something I have struggled with for a long time, and I think it's the first time in my life I'm letting go of a lot of it. I just moved home... I really don't have a lot of friends, I'm not in the place I should be in my life according to the world's opinion, I'm sure not anywhere close to settling down with anyone... and I am finding my own peace through it all. I think it's important to find peace within ourselves rather than within the people we hang out with or the job we have or anything else. Because when those things falter what do you have left? Yourself.
It's been really good for me to dig deeper into myself and find out where my joy lies... and I keep discovering that it doesn't always lie where it should. I've been trying to focus on the simple things, and trying to put my relationship with God first. I've been spending more time alone with him, opening myself up more. I don't think I ever realize how easy it is to sort of keep God at an arm's length away at all times. He's there when I need him, but that's it. I don't want that kind of relationship with him... I want more than that.
Anyway... I think it's important for us to really take the time to evaluate ourselves and find out what truly gives us joy and peace. Is it what others see in us, or what we see in ourselves?
