I've realized something recently... and maybe I've already known this, or maybe I will forget and have to learn it all over again in the future, or maybe I'm just the last person alive to figure this out.
My emotions don't define who I am. If I am feeling low and feeling bad about myself, that doesn't always mean it's true. God defines who I am. I sometimes get so caught up in my emotions that I can't see myself, or anyone else, through God's eyes. Just because one day I feel low, and the next I feel fantastic... it doesn't mean that I was worse off the day before, or better off on the "good" day. If I can hold on to that, then maybe I won't let my emotions rule my life so much.
I'm not saying we shouldn't listen to our emotions. God gave us every emotion we feel... and I think life would be pretty bland with out them, don't you? But if we can start listening more to what God says, and less to what we say... wouldn't that make life a little better for everyone?
This past week was a little tough for me. I was fed up with the drama here and tired of dealing with it, so I spent a lot of time distancing myself from most people. I started to wonder what I was doing here and if I was even affecting anyones life in a positive way, or if I was just adding to the drama. I was being really hard on myself, and I knew it. And then I read Jonah, and noticed something I never thought of before. God could have sent ANYONE to Nineveh... but he chose Jonah. Jonah was hard-headed, scared, stubborn... he even tried to run away from God! God could have easily sent down a legion of angels to get Nineveh to change... but I don't think that's the lesson here. God taught Jonah a whole lot, he used him for good, but he also taught him some pretty valuable lessons along the way. It's funny to me that in chapter 4 when Jonah is praying to God out of his anger, he says "For I KNEW that you are a gracious and compassionate God... slow to anger and abundant in love!" He even asks God to take his life. Jonah knows this about God yet he does exactly the opposite. Gets angry at God at the drop of a hat. At the end of the book, God does something that I find pretty amazing. Jonah is sitting in the desert and God gives him a plant to shade him from the sun and "deliver him from his discomfort.. and Jonah was extremely happy". Then he sends a worm to chew and wither the plant, and after that appoints a "scorching east wind.... he became faint and begged with all his soul to die". God compares Jonahs compassion on the plant (which he didn't work for) to God's own compassion for the city of Nineveh (full of individuals that he loves and cares for). I think that we can all relate to Jonah in some ways. God gives and God takes away. Who are we to be angry with God for what we didn't even work for ourselves? Such proud people we are! And who are we to try and run from God? Such scared and fearful people we are! And who are we to not trust God when he sends us somewhere?... I used to wonder why Jonah made the decisions he made. Why he was so angry with God... and now I see that I'm more like Jonah than I used to think.
God is omnipotent... omniscient... and I am but a tiny clueless speck in this massive universe. Why would I rely on anyone but him? Especially on myself.
God is using me here... and this is where I need to focus all of my energy and all of my mind and heart.
Monday, April 21, 2008
Saturday, April 5, 2008
Take a look!
I thought maybe it was a good time to put up some pictures from the past few months. So here they are!
My teammate Amber at a college retreat we went on
My teammate Amber at a college retreat we went on
Snowing!!
Justina and Katie. 2 of the girls we baby-sit
On our way back from Texas we stopped at these beautiful falls in AZ to hike and enjoy God's beauty
On our way to Texas for Camp Adventure. Two of my teammates; Logan and Kelli
Amber M. and I on the way to TexasA babbling brook (that'd be me)
I don't have any fancy words and thought out "lessons" to share... but I just felt like writing. I'm not even sure what about.
Things around here have been... good. Challenging, but good. I feel as though I have been learning so much. About myself and about others and about God's character. I can be so blind sometimes with what I think is right that I don't see how things really are.. and I've been seeing that lately as well. I can be so hard headed sometimes! But God is using that and he is teaching me.
It's been tough in a lot of ways... with different relationships and team conflict and internal struggles. But I have been joyful, and eager to grow. I have had some beautiful moments with God lately. I've been asking to be led by the Spirit and I've been feeling myself struggle between my desires and the Spirit inside me. I wonder if that's a little bit what Abraham felt like when he wrestled with God. I read in Acts how Paul and the others were led by the Spirit. how Philip was driven by the Spirit to do things he didn't necessarily choose on his own. That's what I want to feel. I want to be so filled with the Spirit that I can't even see myself anymore. That thought scared me at first, but I realize that it's one of the most beautiful things about our relationship with God. We can be so intertwined with him that we ARE him, in a way.
The other night, I started thinking about my niece back home and about my family and about all of the things that I am missing out on. I began feeling pain for those I love... for those around me that are hurting and I was deeply moved. I felt like the Spirit was trying to lead me and take control of my heart. I cried a lot. The tears came from no where, and I spent a lot of time in prayer. I was feeling ashamed of not living more on fire for God... and I was sad for the world that I am sometimes too scared to share Jesus with.
A friend shared a really helpful verse with me that night. Psalm 51:15-17.
Things around here have been... good. Challenging, but good. I feel as though I have been learning so much. About myself and about others and about God's character. I can be so blind sometimes with what I think is right that I don't see how things really are.. and I've been seeing that lately as well. I can be so hard headed sometimes! But God is using that and he is teaching me.
It's been tough in a lot of ways... with different relationships and team conflict and internal struggles. But I have been joyful, and eager to grow. I have had some beautiful moments with God lately. I've been asking to be led by the Spirit and I've been feeling myself struggle between my desires and the Spirit inside me. I wonder if that's a little bit what Abraham felt like when he wrestled with God. I read in Acts how Paul and the others were led by the Spirit. how Philip was driven by the Spirit to do things he didn't necessarily choose on his own. That's what I want to feel. I want to be so filled with the Spirit that I can't even see myself anymore. That thought scared me at first, but I realize that it's one of the most beautiful things about our relationship with God. We can be so intertwined with him that we ARE him, in a way.
The other night, I started thinking about my niece back home and about my family and about all of the things that I am missing out on. I began feeling pain for those I love... for those around me that are hurting and I was deeply moved. I felt like the Spirit was trying to lead me and take control of my heart. I cried a lot. The tears came from no where, and I spent a lot of time in prayer. I was feeling ashamed of not living more on fire for God... and I was sad for the world that I am sometimes too scared to share Jesus with.
A friend shared a really helpful verse with me that night. Psalm 51:15-17.
"O Lord, open my lips and my mouth will declare your praise. For you will not delight in sacrifice, or I would give it; you will not be pleased with a burnt offering. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God you will not despise"
And also: Romans 12:9
"But he said to me,'my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses so that the power of Christ may rest upon me"
I was really encouraged by these verses to stop trying so hard to be perfect and to do things the right way. That's not what this life is about. God wants our efforts and our minds, but most of all he desires our hearts. He calls us to love and shine and just BE. (Isaiah 58:6 and on, explain it perfectly). We don't have to get it all "right" all the time.
I need to shed my fears and shout His name from the mountaintops, whisper it in the fields, and share it in my actions. I need to look at each person as though they are Jesus... I need to love fully and completely and not love based on how I am treated or on what I think is "right". I've seen lately just how biased and unfair I can be at times.
I want my love to know no boundaries.
And I don't want to be afraid of it's power anymore.
I need to shed my fears and shout His name from the mountaintops, whisper it in the fields, and share it in my actions. I need to look at each person as though they are Jesus... I need to love fully and completely and not love based on how I am treated or on what I think is "right". I've seen lately just how biased and unfair I can be at times.
I want my love to know no boundaries.
And I don't want to be afraid of it's power anymore.
Monday, March 10, 2008
Righteous Anger?
Well here we go again; Another day, another life lesson to be learned.
This week's lesson: Anger.
Is there such thing as righteous anger? I used to think that anger was always negative all the time, but in getting to know God better I'm seeing that that obviously isn't true. Look at Jeremiah. Look at Exodus. And of course, look at Jesus in the temple. In Matthew 21 it says that Jesus overturned tables and drove out all who were buying and selling there. When Jesus says "My house is a house of prayer but you have made it a den of robbers"... I picture him with fire in his eyes. Anger turning his face red. His fists clenching. I don't picture Jesus serenely and calmly saying this to the people there. He was angry!
On the other side of it, we are told not to sin in our anger. Ephesians 4:27 says "and do not give the devil a foothold".. and this just after Paul tells us not to let the sun go down on our anger.
With all that said, am I justified in being angry at a group of people who are purposefully and negatively trying to split up our group because of a few small disagreements? Paul dedicates a whole section of his letter to the Ephesians on unity in the church, and how there is one Lord and one body. Verse 2 of chapter 4 says "be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love" Sometimes I think the lines between anger and humility are blurred.. at least for me. Lately I've been put in situations that have angered me. some I've had to humble myself and get over it... and others where I feel my anger is completely justified. I have done so much for our college group here... trying my hardest to unite us and bring us together, and after a few of us spent the weekend painting the musty old room and giving up some of our own couches so there would be comfortable seating... the group threatens to split up because they don't like what we are doing/have done in there. A lot of negative things are being said about the
small number of us who are stepping up and trying to make comfortable changes for the group. Maybe our leadership isn't welcome.. I'm not sure. But my anger doesn't sprout from hurt feelings, or hurt pride. My anger comes from the fact that there are people who want to split the group because they don't like the changes we are making. My anger comes from the fact that people will say all of these things when my back is turned, but deny it when approached, or walk away from me completely. My anger comes mostly from us not being a group. Not being united. That's the only reason I do the things I do... it's all for the group. I don't care about the paint, or the couches.. I will put everything back how it was if it will mean the group staying together. I'm frustrated because of my brothers and sisters not wanting to worship with me over things like paint and cold hard metal folding chairs.
The struggle for me isn't in trying not to be angry. I don't think that my anger is wrong. The struggle is being loving in my anger, and not saying hurtful things to anyone. Jesus acted in his anger because he loved those people in the temple. God acted in his anger in Jeremiah because he loved the Israelites so much and wanted them to get things right. My anger in itself isn't a sin.. it's how I handle it and react to it that's important.
I guess these things will happen in the ministry. I am being watched very closely and as a missionary, I will never be able to please everyone. The best I can do is be patient, humble and loving... and pick and choose my battles.
God is teaching me a lot through all of this.
This week's lesson: Anger.
Is there such thing as righteous anger? I used to think that anger was always negative all the time, but in getting to know God better I'm seeing that that obviously isn't true. Look at Jeremiah. Look at Exodus. And of course, look at Jesus in the temple. In Matthew 21 it says that Jesus overturned tables and drove out all who were buying and selling there. When Jesus says "My house is a house of prayer but you have made it a den of robbers"... I picture him with fire in his eyes. Anger turning his face red. His fists clenching. I don't picture Jesus serenely and calmly saying this to the people there. He was angry!
On the other side of it, we are told not to sin in our anger. Ephesians 4:27 says "and do not give the devil a foothold".. and this just after Paul tells us not to let the sun go down on our anger.
With all that said, am I justified in being angry at a group of people who are purposefully and negatively trying to split up our group because of a few small disagreements? Paul dedicates a whole section of his letter to the Ephesians on unity in the church, and how there is one Lord and one body. Verse 2 of chapter 4 says "be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love" Sometimes I think the lines between anger and humility are blurred.. at least for me. Lately I've been put in situations that have angered me. some I've had to humble myself and get over it... and others where I feel my anger is completely justified. I have done so much for our college group here... trying my hardest to unite us and bring us together, and after a few of us spent the weekend painting the musty old room and giving up some of our own couches so there would be comfortable seating... the group threatens to split up because they don't like what we are doing/have done in there. A lot of negative things are being said about the
small number of us who are stepping up and trying to make comfortable changes for the group. Maybe our leadership isn't welcome.. I'm not sure. But my anger doesn't sprout from hurt feelings, or hurt pride. My anger comes from the fact that there are people who want to split the group because they don't like the changes we are making. My anger comes from the fact that people will say all of these things when my back is turned, but deny it when approached, or walk away from me completely. My anger comes mostly from us not being a group. Not being united. That's the only reason I do the things I do... it's all for the group. I don't care about the paint, or the couches.. I will put everything back how it was if it will mean the group staying together. I'm frustrated because of my brothers and sisters not wanting to worship with me over things like paint and cold hard metal folding chairs.
The struggle for me isn't in trying not to be angry. I don't think that my anger is wrong. The struggle is being loving in my anger, and not saying hurtful things to anyone. Jesus acted in his anger because he loved those people in the temple. God acted in his anger in Jeremiah because he loved the Israelites so much and wanted them to get things right. My anger in itself isn't a sin.. it's how I handle it and react to it that's important.
I guess these things will happen in the ministry. I am being watched very closely and as a missionary, I will never be able to please everyone. The best I can do is be patient, humble and loving... and pick and choose my battles.
God is teaching me a lot through all of this.
Saturday, February 23, 2008
What is love? (baby, don't hurt me)
A lot has happened since my last post! It seems like as soon we feel like things are going well, it all has to change. Things can't always work out the way we desire, I suppose. If things were perfect here than we wouldn't need to be here at all.
A good friend here was saying how he believes that we are here on this earth because of love. God is love, right? And we were created in his image.... well, what is love? 1 Cor 13 will give us a list. And many other places in the Bible talks about love as well... but specifically in 1 Cor we see that love is patient and kind and not rude or self-seeking.... how would we ever learn those things if we were never in a place that has time, or boundaries, or pain. If we were just created to be with God in Heaven and skipped this whole Earth thing, then we would never truly known and understand what his love for us really is. We would just be in this amazing place and not even appreciate it because we never suffered or felt pain or loved someone or needed God. He wants us to really know and feel and understand his love, and he wants us to teach it to everyone we encounter. It's a really beautiful concept if you sit and think about it for a while.
I've been thinking a lot about love lately, in every aspect. How to love someone who's wronged me. How to love my team. How to love the unlovables of this world. How God may or may not bless me with a spouse one day. It can all be very overwhelming at times... especially because the world has really twisted the meaning of the word love.
For example: A situation has come up recently that a person very close to me has been sinning against me in secret. It's been going on for a long time, and was found out on accident. The world would teach me to be angry and upset... to victimize myself and to make this person feel guilty and wrong and bad about themselves. And honestly, part of me wanted to.. a big part of me. But God teaches me to regard this person as family, help them to see they have a sin problem and love them despite the fact that I've been hurt. God loves this person, so incredibly much, it's the sin that he despises. Who am I, as a sinner, to hate this person for that when God loves ME so much as well.
I'm not saying that I wasn't hurt, and even angry at some points, but I know how important it is to fight to be loving... which isn't only an emotion, but mostly based on actions. I definitely think the 2 go hand-in-hand when it comes to love. We can say we feel love but if our actions don't show it then we aren't being loving. We can show it in our actions but not feel it at all in our hearts... which I don't think is wrong, necessarily but I don't think it's complete either. I still haven't figured it all out yet, but then, I don't think I ever will. The best I can do is strive to learn as much as I can before I leave this place.
I have been put in situations recently that I wouldn't have been able to handle the way I have been if it weren't for the things God has been showing me. I wonder how I would have reacted just a few short months ago, and I think the outcome would be very different. God tends to do that sometimes, doesn't he? I need to remember that I am continually learning new things and in no way should I ever feel I know enough.
We've been spending a lot of time with the homeless lately, and I feel like I have allowed myself to be filled with a feeling of contentment over that. Maybe a little bit pride as well. I don't want to ever feel like what I am doing is enough. I want to always be looking for opportunities and always be striving to serve more. I think I often get my fill of "good deeds" for a day and then settle back a little bit and miss opportunities because I'm too busy being proud of myself. I think some days I need God to shake me a little bit and remind me that there can ALWAYS be MORE done in this world. I've been praying for God to use me and shake up my world a bit and make me uncomfortable in my serving. It's a hard thing to ask and some days I'm not even sure if I'd be willing to to listen if he showed me, but I am hoping that I can ignore my selfishness and do what needs to be done.
I have a feeling that God is going to answer my prayers in some pretty strange ways.
I'm looking forward to it.
A good friend here was saying how he believes that we are here on this earth because of love. God is love, right? And we were created in his image.... well, what is love? 1 Cor 13 will give us a list. And many other places in the Bible talks about love as well... but specifically in 1 Cor we see that love is patient and kind and not rude or self-seeking.... how would we ever learn those things if we were never in a place that has time, or boundaries, or pain. If we were just created to be with God in Heaven and skipped this whole Earth thing, then we would never truly known and understand what his love for us really is. We would just be in this amazing place and not even appreciate it because we never suffered or felt pain or loved someone or needed God. He wants us to really know and feel and understand his love, and he wants us to teach it to everyone we encounter. It's a really beautiful concept if you sit and think about it for a while.
I've been thinking a lot about love lately, in every aspect. How to love someone who's wronged me. How to love my team. How to love the unlovables of this world. How God may or may not bless me with a spouse one day. It can all be very overwhelming at times... especially because the world has really twisted the meaning of the word love.
For example: A situation has come up recently that a person very close to me has been sinning against me in secret. It's been going on for a long time, and was found out on accident. The world would teach me to be angry and upset... to victimize myself and to make this person feel guilty and wrong and bad about themselves. And honestly, part of me wanted to.. a big part of me. But God teaches me to regard this person as family, help them to see they have a sin problem and love them despite the fact that I've been hurt. God loves this person, so incredibly much, it's the sin that he despises. Who am I, as a sinner, to hate this person for that when God loves ME so much as well.
I'm not saying that I wasn't hurt, and even angry at some points, but I know how important it is to fight to be loving... which isn't only an emotion, but mostly based on actions. I definitely think the 2 go hand-in-hand when it comes to love. We can say we feel love but if our actions don't show it then we aren't being loving. We can show it in our actions but not feel it at all in our hearts... which I don't think is wrong, necessarily but I don't think it's complete either. I still haven't figured it all out yet, but then, I don't think I ever will. The best I can do is strive to learn as much as I can before I leave this place.
I have been put in situations recently that I wouldn't have been able to handle the way I have been if it weren't for the things God has been showing me. I wonder how I would have reacted just a few short months ago, and I think the outcome would be very different. God tends to do that sometimes, doesn't he? I need to remember that I am continually learning new things and in no way should I ever feel I know enough.
We've been spending a lot of time with the homeless lately, and I feel like I have allowed myself to be filled with a feeling of contentment over that. Maybe a little bit pride as well. I don't want to ever feel like what I am doing is enough. I want to always be looking for opportunities and always be striving to serve more. I think I often get my fill of "good deeds" for a day and then settle back a little bit and miss opportunities because I'm too busy being proud of myself. I think some days I need God to shake me a little bit and remind me that there can ALWAYS be MORE done in this world. I've been praying for God to use me and shake up my world a bit and make me uncomfortable in my serving. It's a hard thing to ask and some days I'm not even sure if I'd be willing to to listen if he showed me, but I am hoping that I can ignore my selfishness and do what needs to be done.
I have a feeling that God is going to answer my prayers in some pretty strange ways.
I'm looking forward to it.
Saturday, January 26, 2008
Ripples
It's amazing what God can do with the choices we make. 6 months ago I thought I was going to be in Brazil, and here I am in little ol' Grass Valley, California. I knew that I would be stretched here, and that I would grow and change but I never really understood how much. God has been doing amazing things, and I have been learning so incredibly much.
The team has been doing really well... we have been working hard to keep our focus on the important things and less on our own issues. It will never be perfect but if we keep our minds and hearts set on what's above than we will touch many lives here. Lately I've been praying for God to use me in any way possible, and he has been.
We have been volunteering at a place called the Hospitality House, hanging out with the homeless. We usually take turns on Sunday nights going downtown to the Catholic church where they stay overnight. I have grown to really care for some of the people there. There is one man in particular who has really touched my heart. His name is Paul and he is very unique indeed. Most of the homeless we encounter are either alcoholics, into drugs, or content with where they are- Paul is quite the opposite. He's looking into getting a job as a truck driver, and his faith in the Lord is so strong that it makes me reevaluate myself at times. He has been ignored, rejected, and looked down upon by so many people.. including (or more appropriately, ESPECIALLY) Christians, but he still searches for the good in people. This past Sunday night, my friend Leeland and I went to the church to hang out- and spent nearly 3 hours talking with Paul. Towards the end of our time together he said to us... "If I had eaten nothing at all today, and had no place to sleep tonight I would still feel filled because of talking to you". If that's not what this is all about then I don't know what is.
I'm finally beginning to learn what being a true disciple is all about. It's not about going to the church building every Sunday... or having small group on Tuesday, game night on Friday, and Bible studies in between. (Although all those things are very important and very necessary...). But it's about being Jesus to people, and recognizing Jesus in them. It's about loving the way God loves, and not the way society has taught us to. It's about sharing what we know through not only our words but especially our actions.
God has been so good to me, in so many ways... with the house I live in, the food I eat, the friends I have, even the shoes and socks on my feet. I take advantage of these things daily... when there are people like Paul who struggle to eat one meal each day. God is slowly opening my eyes to the need that's all around me, and I know that with the work that we are doing here, we are barely causing a ripple... but it's a start.
The team has been doing really well... we have been working hard to keep our focus on the important things and less on our own issues. It will never be perfect but if we keep our minds and hearts set on what's above than we will touch many lives here. Lately I've been praying for God to use me in any way possible, and he has been.
We have been volunteering at a place called the Hospitality House, hanging out with the homeless. We usually take turns on Sunday nights going downtown to the Catholic church where they stay overnight. I have grown to really care for some of the people there. There is one man in particular who has really touched my heart. His name is Paul and he is very unique indeed. Most of the homeless we encounter are either alcoholics, into drugs, or content with where they are- Paul is quite the opposite. He's looking into getting a job as a truck driver, and his faith in the Lord is so strong that it makes me reevaluate myself at times. He has been ignored, rejected, and looked down upon by so many people.. including (or more appropriately, ESPECIALLY) Christians, but he still searches for the good in people. This past Sunday night, my friend Leeland and I went to the church to hang out- and spent nearly 3 hours talking with Paul. Towards the end of our time together he said to us... "If I had eaten nothing at all today, and had no place to sleep tonight I would still feel filled because of talking to you". If that's not what this is all about then I don't know what is.
I'm finally beginning to learn what being a true disciple is all about. It's not about going to the church building every Sunday... or having small group on Tuesday, game night on Friday, and Bible studies in between. (Although all those things are very important and very necessary...). But it's about being Jesus to people, and recognizing Jesus in them. It's about loving the way God loves, and not the way society has taught us to. It's about sharing what we know through not only our words but especially our actions.
God has been so good to me, in so many ways... with the house I live in, the food I eat, the friends I have, even the shoes and socks on my feet. I take advantage of these things daily... when there are people like Paul who struggle to eat one meal each day. God is slowly opening my eyes to the need that's all around me, and I know that with the work that we are doing here, we are barely causing a ripple... but it's a start.
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
A new day
I was sitting on my couch the other night... enjoying a nice candlelit evening with my roommates (sounds a little weird, I know..) It was around midnight when Jon walked in with Kelli- they had been hanging out- and 2 strange figures... one much shorter than the other. It was dark and I was really confused, wondering who these crazy people Jon had brought with him, and then he turned the light on. I was pretty shocked and very, very happy to see my sister and my niece... who should have been 3000 miles across the country... standing in the doorway. I jumped, I cried, I smiled from ear to ear, and I almost fainted with delight. It was just what I needed. It was common knowledge to everyone else in my life that they would be there... but I had no clue. They only stayed for a few days, but it was pretty special. I got to show them a little bit of the town and some of what I've been doing here. It was just really encouraging to have family here... there was a sense of relief and comfort I haven't really felt in a long time. I was sad to send them off on Monday, but excited because I get to go home next week. I will be with my family for two whole weeks.... and this couldn't be a more perfect time to go. Things are kind of rough back home- with the house having major water damage, and not being able to have a real traditional Christmas because of it, and my oldest sister moving to Germany soon, and Sue being sick. I have been homesick for a while and I am really looking forward to being with my loved ones again. I will have to make the best of it knowing that it will most likely be a while before I will be able to be home with them again.
It was really nice to have Mary and Kiera around for some of the things we had going on. They got to be here for game night, and then we had a ladie's day on Saturday and that night 2 of the younger girls stayed over. My niece, Kiera got along with them really well and they had a lot of fun together. I'm hoping one day to convince my sister to move out here and join the work that's going on.
It's been intense here lately. A lot of small issues being turned into large ones. mostly coming from feelings of being useless. It's been tough some days knowing that there are so many things that we could be doing that we aren't. So we decided that we need to just make things happen.. no more waiting around for things to come to us. So we did. We got applications for the Big Brother/Big sister program, and also for a food ministry that is literally yards from our house. We also got in touch with a house here that takes in the homeless during the day and brings them to different churches each night to get out of the cold. Jo and I went today and spent the day getting to know the job and the people there. Our biggest work is to spend time with the people that come there. There was a family there that we had helped in the past, by bringing them food at another place they were staying. It was a really pleasant surprise to see them there. Just the other day we went by where they used to stay to see them and they weren't there.. and we had no way of finding them. They have a 13 year old son, and we got to spend some time catching up with them. I think I had forgotten how important it is to put other people before myself. For a little while I was getting really caught up in team drama, and my own little dramas that I was losing what I was really here for. It was nice to be reminded of the important things in life. It's amazing how God opens our eyes sometimes, whether we are asking for it or not. He has really been showing me a lot lately, and I'm looking forward to see what happens in the future here.
It was really nice to have Mary and Kiera around for some of the things we had going on. They got to be here for game night, and then we had a ladie's day on Saturday and that night 2 of the younger girls stayed over. My niece, Kiera got along with them really well and they had a lot of fun together. I'm hoping one day to convince my sister to move out here and join the work that's going on.
It's been intense here lately. A lot of small issues being turned into large ones. mostly coming from feelings of being useless. It's been tough some days knowing that there are so many things that we could be doing that we aren't. So we decided that we need to just make things happen.. no more waiting around for things to come to us. So we did. We got applications for the Big Brother/Big sister program, and also for a food ministry that is literally yards from our house. We also got in touch with a house here that takes in the homeless during the day and brings them to different churches each night to get out of the cold. Jo and I went today and spent the day getting to know the job and the people there. Our biggest work is to spend time with the people that come there. There was a family there that we had helped in the past, by bringing them food at another place they were staying. It was a really pleasant surprise to see them there. Just the other day we went by where they used to stay to see them and they weren't there.. and we had no way of finding them. They have a 13 year old son, and we got to spend some time catching up with them. I think I had forgotten how important it is to put other people before myself. For a little while I was getting really caught up in team drama, and my own little dramas that I was losing what I was really here for. It was nice to be reminded of the important things in life. It's amazing how God opens our eyes sometimes, whether we are asking for it or not. He has really been showing me a lot lately, and I'm looking forward to see what happens in the future here.
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