Thursday, January 1, 2009

Today is the day before tomorrow

It's been a while so I thought it might be time to update.. not that many people even read these but its nice to just release some thoughts here and there.

Things have been so up and down, but the one constant has of course been my Savior. That's something that I've been really holding onto these days, is that as often as things change, I will always have a steady force in my life, if I choose. I've been stressed with this job, and waiting to get certified (which is taking a month longer than it was supposed to), not seeing much of anyone because I work so much, missing my ministries, missing my family through these lonely holidays... but you know what... it doesn't even matter. I realize that I spend too much time wondering about how things would be if they were different that I miss out on what's right in front of me. I am blessed with a good secure job during these rough times, I can still continue with my ministries, just in different ways (my job in itself is its own ministry), my family will always be there for me- no matter how far away, and I have amazing friends who pick me up when I am down. God is so good to me yet I still look for the negative things in my life. I have this very special, encouraging friend at work who is always reminding me of what's important. The other day she shared with me a few things to help stay positive and the two that stuck out the most were to try not to complain about anything, and to not wish you were somewhere else doing something else. Just focusing on these small (or large, however you look at it) things through out the day has made a huge difference for me. Instead of waking up to an empty house in the morning feeling sorry for myself.. I get up, I do something, I clean and read the Bible, I stay busy. And instead of going to work feeling bitter or burnt out, I remember that I was put here for a reason, and God is using me. I sometimes forget just how much having a positive attitude affects my day. It's so easy to get upset and blame it on the things around me, when really It's all about how I choose to perceive things. It all comes down to personal choice, really. If I let the things and the people around me control my emotions then I will never truly find the inner joy that God has given me. So that is what I am focusing on right now... staying positive when things look bleak. God is blessing me... every day, and he is taking care of me.